Saturday, August 16, 2008

A New Era Of Motherhood

I am entering a new era of motherhood and I don't know how I feel about it. Tel will begin preschool on Monday. It is only for 2 hours, twice a week but it is school. This is my baby, there will be no more (a small procedure performed on my not so willing hubbie, but I gave birth to two good sized babies vaginally so there was a basis for the short straw draw, has guaranteed this). Dax is in the 3rd grade this year and according to the 1st class newsletter he will be learning how to write in cursive, multiplication, and will incorporate an actual science class. These are things that are needed for all his future educational career not to mention life skills. When did his primary schooling turn into life skills. I have issues with this as well. I thought it was cute when he learned how to read and write and even more cute when he could do math but my 1st baby is really learning stuff that he will need for the rest of his life-- that isn't the cute stuff anymore it's hard stuff. Am I prepared for him to struggle if he does? Dax is amazingly smart and I'm not just saying that because he is my son. He is an 8 year old 3rd grader who reads and writes on an 8th grade level. School, thus far, has been a breeze for him and I want him to continue to succeed (I have prepared myself for Dax to become a rocket scientist or brain surgeon--there isn't any smarter careers are there, hence the "It doesn't take a .... to know that") Back to Tel: my baby. He is so excited to start school and even more excited to find out that he will have homework. Yes, you heard correctly-homework. Tel's first newsletter informed the parents that they will need to provide treats once every 8 weeks, will be in charge of the "sound" bag every 8 weeks (something to do with learning the sounds of the alphabet) and helping their child with their homework that will be sent home in a folder which on one side holds the homework and on the other side holds the work completed and notes home. I am NOT ready for all of the "big boy" shit yet; as you probably noticed by all of the above incoherent rambling. I am so happy for my boys to become awesome but they are my babies and I fear them not needing me; which is what comes after homework in preschool and times tables in cursive.
On a side note: I got a new puppy (that makes 4 dogs) she is a border collie and seems to be very good. She is catching onto simple commands and stays faithfully by our side when any of us is outside. Unfortunately she is fascinated with my potted flowers and has knocked over and up-rooted a pot on more than one occasion. I think due to age, this isn't bothering me as much as it did with our other border collie who loved to get inside of my planters and dig the flowers up. I may be freaking out about my boys growing up but at least I know that if I were to have waited until later in life to have them I would have gotten to the point when nothing was really bothersome and therefore I wouldn't dwell on the transitions of their lives. I think it is better that I freak out; because strong emotion is what deeply embeds memories---Right?

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