For Sale

The sign is in the ground!!! Today, well yesterday, I began the scrub the floors, walls, ceilings, lights, and everything else that someone might scrutinize routine for today the realtor came and took pictures that will be posted online! I am not as tech savvy as some of you, I cannot add links to this shit nor can I post pics that I took myself so I must rely heavily on my skill of painting a picture with words. My house is spotless even for my standards. So "put together" that my realtor (oh, we ended up going with a realtor because a friend of ours said it helps weed out the broke ass weirdos who kill time by pilfering your prized possessions) said "Darcie, it is unnecessary for your house to be perfect for every showing". Hmmmmm...... does she know me??? I FREAK out when I am going to entertain family and close friends, WTF am I going to do knowing that strangers are deciding whether or not to make the biggest purchase of their lives. MAJOR pressure. How do you get beyond this? I am also freaked because I worry that my house will not sell. I want someone to make an offer tomorrow so that my ego and love for my dwelling is validated. I know it is ridiculous thinking, but it creeps into the fore front of my thoughts periodically and I don't know how to banish it all together. I am so excited and yet so nervous. I know this is what I want to do but I want it done....yesterday. I hate the wait, the worry, the staging. For all of you who have sold a house (not during the house buying spree but during the "normal" selling/buying times) how did you get through this? How long will it take for someone to buy my house? How much should I stage? clean? Please, oh please, even those of you who don't comment do so anonymously if you must. I need answers. It's like going to the hospital to give birth to your first child and never reading or taking a child birth class. You know it will take awhile, but how long and how much pain is it going to inflict? Please help me.

nothing resembling organized thoughts

I am on here because I am looking up how to broil sirloin steak. I began learning how to cook about 7 years ago when my oldest son needed to start eating REAL food and due to my hubbie's shitty work schedule. J isn't always here at night to cook us dinner and it was ok for me to go without but I couldn't let my kid go without and Hot Pockets and other frozen delights aren't really what I wanted to raise my child on. As you can see I haven't found the recipe and I'm having a difficult time doing so because I am surfing and now blogging because I haven't done so in a LONG time. Today is J's 30th birthday. He is at work and won't return until way past our dinner time but I thought it would be nice of me to cook his fave meal and have it waiting for him when he arrives. I wanted to do something special for his big day but he wasn't into it. I got him a couple little gifts so that my boys could watch him unwrap something. J will probably be mad because he told me not to buy him anything. It isn't the "I don't want to admit I'm growing older so I will ignore my birthday and force everyone else to ignore it too" syndrome, he just hates the big "to do's" I do for holidays, birthdays, and other special occasions. I was raised this way. Birthdays were as big as a "normal" family's Christmas, 4th of July, Pioneer Day, and Halloween celebrations lasted two days, I would walk into a bedroom loaded with "valentines" after school each year, Easter encompassed new outfits and a loaded basket, and Christmas was obscene. I am speaking in past tense but it still continues today. Santa Claus still visits my parent's house for my sister and I (and our kids). My mom's nickname is literally "Miss Holiday", given to her by my father. We were by no means rich when I was a child. My family qualified for state aid. My mom just pulled cash out of her ass when she felt it was necessary--HOLIDAYS!! I was talking to my aunt the other day and she said that she saw my mom wandering around the store and asked what she was looking for. My mom said she didn't know for sure but she needed to get a gift for "my girls" (my sister and I) for the end of the school year because this is what she has always done. Yes, she does give us a "end of school year" gift every year. When we were in school it was an obvious celebration, and yes, I do teach now so it could be carried over. But what about Day??? She doesn't attend nor work at a school and technically I don't need a "graduated another grade level" gift anymore. Chances are she will get one for the grand kids too: 1 for completing Kindergarten, 1 for completing the 2nd grade, and 2 for entering pre-school next year. That is TRULY how she justifies her celebrations. It is very corny but oh so sweet. I love my mom and the only thing that makes her happy to her toes is doing something nice for someone else. I have fallen victim to her footsteps, hence the gifts where there was no desire, the dinner I don't know how to cook, and the cake that I will probably eat myself and gain a huge ass for the summer. Happy Birthday J! I love you Mom, thanks for teaching me to celebrate life, with gifts!!!

Hives

So I broke out in hives on Sunday afternoon, for no apparent reason. It was the last day of a too much fun weekend out of town with my hubbie and I was changing into my bathing suit so that I could spend my last 1 1/2 hours before check out poolside. There they were. Not itching yet but welts, splotches, red bumps--no mistaking hives. I hadn't used new products on myself, I wasn't having a bout of hay fever, I don't know what caused them. Here it is Tuesday afternoon and I still have them on both arms, on my left leg, and of all the worse places: my forehead. After telling different people about my strange break out they replied with "are you stressed" and I replied "no, I was having a good time. I don't know what brought them on". After further analysis I am starting to think they are stress related. The end of the school year is in a couple of weeks, I have to finish and submit 2 different portfolios in the next week, I have to go out of town again for another conference and my sub (whom I asked months ago) bailed on me last minute and I was having a hard time finding someone else (god bless you Forrest, I don't know what I would do if you didn't volunteer), my oldest son has half a dozen god forsaken things happening at and after school to celebrate the end of another school year, my in laws (uncles and grandmother, not parents) are making our sell and move damn near impossible because they want to ensure their kids can build when ready which is ridiculous why should we make it easy for them when it is so freakin hard for us, I "heard" there is a gentleman looking for a house in my little town and is willing to pay what I want to ask for but I don't dare put my house up for sell until I'm guaranteed a building lot THIS F-ING YEAR, my husband has now decided that he wants to use a realtor but is thinking about adding a basement to our new house so "Darcie I know you have found your perfect floor plan but now you need to find another with a basement even though you have never wanted a basement", I need to prep my house for possible buyers but don't know what to do because I don't want to put in more time/money/work than the bare minimum because I am ready to be done with it, my lawn looks so shitty this year and I don't know why or what to do I have always been blessed with green thumb when it comes to the out of doors but this year I am gardening challenged----OH GOD I'M ITCHING MORE JUST VENTING ABOUT THE SHIT!
To end on a positive note: I had a blast this weekend. I indulged in EVERYTHING too much but enjoyed every minute of it. Caught up with old friends, met new ones, danced with fun girlfriends and not so fun slutty friends, ran into high school friends and reminisced, requested great songs from my life to an awesome band, danced and sang at the top of my lungs to the songs (along with all the other bagillion people in the place). It was the best annual golf tournament I have gone to--thank you Jesse and let's do it again next year!